Retirement Quotes

When that last day of work comes – whether for you or someone else – toasts will be offered and funny stories shared. For some of us, coming up with the right words can be a challenge, but sometimes we can lean on others for retirement quotes that do the trick. If you are struggling to put pen to paper on the card you bought, here are a few good lines to help out:

 

 

General Retirement Quotes

“I promise to keep on living as though I expected to live forever. Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old only by deserting their ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up interest wrinkles the soul.”

Douglas MacArthur

 

“Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache…unless you play golf.”

Gene Perret

 

“It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.”

Scott Elledge

"The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income."

 

George Foreman

23-03-2012
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“Retirement, a time to enjoy life! A time to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, how you want to do it.”

Catherine Pulsifer

 

“There’s one thing I always wanted to do before I quit – retire!”

Groucho Marx

 

“Retirement has been a discovery of beauty for me. I never had the time before to notice the beauty of my grandkids, my wife, the tree outside my very own front door. And, the beauty of time itself.”

Hartman Jule

 

“The concept of freedom is never truly realized until one settles into retirement mode.”

A. Major

 

“When a man retires, and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.”

R.C. Sheriff

 

“Retire from work, but not from life.”

M. K. Soni

 

“I'm not just retiring from my company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron.”

Hartman Jule

 

"The key to retirement is to find joy in the little things."

Susan Miller

 

Retirement Quotes for Men

"When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking."                   

Gail Sheehy

 

"When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income."

Chi Chi Rodriguez

 

"When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you. "

Gene Perret

 

"Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I"m home - forever."

Gene Perret

 

"When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch."

R C Sherriff

 

"Few men of action have been able to make a graceful exit at the appropriate time."

Malcolm Muggeridge

 

"A man is known by the company that keeps him on after retirement age."

Anon

 

"Retirement has been a discovery of beauty for me. I never had the time before to notice the beauty of my grandkids, my wife, the tree outside my very own front door…And the beauty of time itself."

Hartman Jule

 

"One of the best hearing aids a [retired] man can have is an attentive wife."

Groucho Marx

 

 Funny Retirement Quotes

"Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf."

Gene Perret

 

"Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money."

Jonathan Clements

 

"The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring."

Milton Berle

 

"A lot of our friends complain about their retirement. We tell 'em to get a life."

Larry Laser

 

"I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early."

 Charles Lamb

 

"It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man."

Scott Elledge

 

"When one door closes, another one opens, but we often look so long and regretfully at the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us."

Alexander Graham Bell

 

"There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit...retire!"

 Groucho Marx

 

"I've lit the blue touch paper and found there's nowhere to retire to."

Doctor Who

 

"Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did."

Malcolm Forbes

 

"Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial."

Seneca

 

"Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it."

Gene Perret

 

"Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did."

Robert Benchley

 

"The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off."

Abe Lemons

 

"Retired is being twice tired, I've thought First tired of working, Then tired of not."

Richard Armour

 

"I've been attending lots of seminars in my retirement.  They're called naps."

 Merri Brownworth

 

 Inspirational Retirement Quotes

"Dont think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Let him come out as I do and , and bark”. 

Samuel Johnson

 

"I promise to keep on living as though I expected to live forever. Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old only by deserting their ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up interest wrinkles the soul."

Douglas MacArthur

 

"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind … it doesn’t matter."

 Mark Twain

 

"Retirement, a time to enjoy life! A time to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, how you want to do it."

 Catherine Pulsifer

 

"Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can’t retire his experience. He must use it."

Bernard Baruch

 

"Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time."

J. Lubbock

 

"Sometimes it's important to work for that pot of gold. But other times it's essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow."

Douglas Pagels

 

"Don't simply retire from something; have something to retire to."

Harry Emerson Fosdick

 

 Ironical Quotes on Retirement

"If you have the time, you won't have the money. If you have the money, you won't have the time."

Wolter's Law

 

"When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch."

R.C. Sherriff

 

"Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save."

Will Rogers

 

 Early Retirement Quotes 

"There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working."

Robert Half

 

"The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income. "

George Foreman

 

 Life Quotes

"Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace."

Amelia Earhart

 

"Once we recognize what it is we are feeling, once we recognize we can feel deeply, love deeply, can feel joy, then we will demand that all parts of our lives produce that kind of joy."

Audre Lorde

 

"To change one's life:   1. Start immediately.   2. Do it flamboyantly.   3. No exceptions."

William James